What does "Family Life" mean to you?
Sharing life’s experiences together, enjoying the successes of each family member as well as the growing pains. Being together as a family makes many of our daily duties possible and even enjoyable. It feels good to have those you love count on you. Family life means “we’re in this together good or bad”, and I’m here for you all with unconditional love and support.
Describe your childhood:
Adoptive Mom? I was raised in a small town in the Midwest where I attended Catholic school with my only sibling, a younger sister, four years my junior. I am an animal lover so I had many wonderful dogs and cats over the years. Every summer my dad planted a big garden which meant lots of good fruit and veggies but also lots of work. We lived across the road from a ski resort, so I learned to ski, ice skate, and snowmobile and am still a winter outdoor enthusiast today. My mom and dad both worked fulltime so I learned to be hard working and responsible from them as well as to treat all people with respect. I also enjoyed a close relationship with both sets of my grandparents and enjoyed traveling to see one set at their winter home in Florida and traveling to help the other set with their working farm. I truly enjoyed my childhood years and looking back on them, wouldn’t change a thing.
Adoptive Dad?
I was born on a large farm in the Midwest and was the oldest of 9 children born to Irish Catholic parents. We had a rich country life and we were never bored or short on things to do, including milking cows, feeding cattle/sheep and gathering eggs all before heading off to school each morning. As a young boy, playing sports in school seemed like the most important thing to me. My brothers and I spend our entire summers baling and hauling hay during the day and playing baseball at night. Mom and Dad worked us very hard, but were supportive of our schooling and playing sports. I’ve always said the toughest job I’ve ever had was working on our farm as a boy growing up and as I look back, I believe that has proven to be a great character builder. I also enjoyed being a role model, mentor and at times even helping to parent my eight younger brothers and sisters.
Tell us about your home?
We built our home in a beautiful wooded suburb in 1996. We both enjoyed being able to work with the builder to pick out the style, brick, and color of the outside and inside. We had a lot of fun coordinating items such as cabinets, countertops and carpeting. We have lots of open space including four large bedrooms. The one closest to our master bedroom was designed for our baby. Since we have a full basement and beautiful backyard we have lots of play space for a child from infancy through the teenage years. Our family room has comfy furniture and a big screen TV where we like to curl up with all our pets and watch movies, reality TV and our favorite sports teams. Our house is cozy and we often have both sides of our families visit for summer barbecues and holidays.
When you have a 3-day weekend, what do you like to do?
We look forward to spending time together as a couple. Some of our favorite things to do are just relaxing, seeing a movie, traveling and attending sporting events. We enjoy the long weekends to take a road trip and get together with our friends and family that live a bit farther away. Sometimes we stay close to home and take on a household project such as mulching the flowerbeds, painting a bedroom or cleaning out the garage.
Do you have pets? If so tell us about them?
We have a yellow Labrador Retriever named Molly. She is full of life and brings lots of energy to our house. She fits the Lab mold as she is loving and loyal, and good with people and other animals. We also have three cats. Two are Calico sisters that we rescued from a local parking lot when someone discarded them as kittens, and our grey Tabby, Ruby, was found in our backyard as a tiny kitten. We tell all four of them every day how much we adore and love them!
What is your favorite food?
Monica’s favorite food in the whole world is cottage cheese. Jim’s is banana cream pie.
What do you hope to teach your children?
We want our children to grow up with an appreciation for the good things they have as well an understanding that many people in this world have to get by with less. We want our child to respect life and others, believe in themselves and always do their very best in whatever they are trying to achieve. Lastly, we want them to realize how much they are loved unconditionally.
Do you play any musical instruments?
Monica plays piano and clarinet, and Jim nothing higher than the tonette.
Describe your neighborhood?
We live in an upper middle class subdivision of 70 homes, which is located across the street from a brand new local high school. Most of the home lots are wooded and well kept. Our neighbors are friendly and often give a wave, stop by to pick up the paper when someone is away or offer help to a neighbor in need. Our neighborhood is within walking distance of a manmade lake with local restaurants and shopping surrounding it. We have nice, wide sidewalks making the neighborhood perfect for riding bikes, jogging and dog walking.
Share something about your spouse that only you know:
Adoptive Mom? I know what a romantic Jim is, when others wouldn’t guess.
Adoptive Dad? Monica is an afternoon napper.
Describe the last romantic thing you did together?
We went to dinner, a movie and came home to relax in our hot tub.
What will you tell your child about their birthmother?
We will tell our child what a generous and courageous woman she is. We would like to share things we learn about her such as her hobbies, likes/dislikes, her childhood and what a beautiful day it was for all of us when they were born.
It's Daddy's day - what activity do you want to share with your child?
Make a pancake breakfast at home, and then drive out to the nearby baseball stadium for an afternoon game. Have a hot dog at the stadium for lunch and share some popcorn. Take a few pictures with the mascot too! After the game, head home to help Mom unload groceries from the car, barbecue for dinner and then watch a movie all curled up together with the family pets.
Do you plan on sharing with your child what their birth parents were like?
Yes, by all means. We will even share more if all sides agree and that is acceptable.
What kind of education are you hoping to provide for your child - Private or Public?
Monica attended a private school and Jim a rural public school. We’re not sure we feel strongly either way. It would be based on what is best for our child at that time, as well as the schools’ ratings, special curriculum and location.
How did you come to the decision of adoption?
After unsuccessfully trying to conceive a child, we were fortunate to meet several people that have adopted children, including newborns. Monica has a close friend at work who adopted three children and Jim’s brother has adopted two children. In all cases they have been happy, successful adoptions. We realized that the option of adoption could work for us too!
What faith will you raise your child?
We will raise our child in the Catholic faith.
How will you help your child accomplish their dreams?
We will support our child’s dreams by offering encouragement and support while allowing them to grow and safely learn the lessons life brings.
What kind of a relationship do you hope to build with your birthmom through her pregnancy?
We want to be as supportive of our birthmom as we would anyone in our own family; after all she gave our child “life”. We are willing to have an open relationship with our birthmom if she wishes the same.
How did you meet?
We were introduced by Jim’s brother at a golf event.
What was your relationship with your parents like?
We both had close relationships with our parents and loved them very much. We both were especially close with our moms. Monica had a working mom and Jim a stay-at-home mom. Our dads both worked afternoons and much of our after-school time was spent with our mothers which allowed for a special closeness. Ironically, we are both the oldest in our family and with that comes a little extra responsibility like helping out with household chores, siblings and many other responsibilities.
What attracted you to each other?
We realized right away that we made each other laugh, had a lot in common and enjoyed each other’s company. Since we lived 40 miles apart, while dating we had to actually make an effort in order to see one another. It was quickly evident that this effort made for a greater love and appreciation of each other.
Please describe your personalities:
Adoptive Mom? Monica is fun-loving and at the same time independent. She is a strong and loyal friend/support to those she knows and loves.
Adoptive Dad? Jim is reliable, and has a relaxed and easygoing nature about him that is a great match for Monica.
What are your hobbies (please share those you enjoy as individuals and those you enjoy as a couple):
Adoptive Mom? Reading, shopping, sewing, pets, and yard work.
Adoptive Dad? Golf, all sports, watching nature animals (birds/deer), and yard work.
Together, we love to go to the movies, travel and spend time with our family and friends.
When you close your eyes and see yourself holding your precious baby in your arms what are your thoughts regarding the birthmother?
What a strong and courageous young woman she must be. How unselfish she is to put a precious little life before anything else and how thankful and honored I feel that she chose me as her child’s adoptive mother.
How will a child enrich your life?
We look forward to having a child in our lives and becoming a family of “3”. We want to share so much with this new little life, starting with encouraging our child to dream big, and then strive and achieve what they truly want from life. We look forward to giving support, direction and advice as parents when it is appropriate to help our child. We will love, nurture and watch our child grow into a young adult and then out on their own, into the world, prepared for “life”.
Why did you each choose the career path you decided on?
Adoptive Mom? Monica loves cars and went to work for a company that makes automobiles.
Adoptive Dad? Jim enjoys talking to people, which makes a natural and successful salesman.
What makes a birthmom special?
She unselfishly provided a new little life that will be loved and adored by us and our entire family. Through adoption the birthmom has generously changed, for the better, the lives of three people, Jim, Monica and the baby. With great appreciation for her courageous decision, we say “Thank you so much for choosing us!”
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